A Few Thoughts on Mother’s Day

Dear Substack Readers and Friends,

Me with my mom and dad before the birth of my brother

I wish all of my readers, especially mothers and those who have good memories of their mothers a Happy Mother’s Day. Nothing makes me happier than to see people whose memories of motherhood and being the child of a mother that cared for them speaking of their memories. I have good memories of my mother, especially during childhood. She was a hero when my dad was deployed for the better of three years from 1971-1974. But, as an adult she sometimes caused me pain. I will not dwell on that and it will suffice to say that I love her and believe that over the years we have come to understand one another more fully. We had a nice conversation today despite being on opposite sides of the continent.

However, I know or have met far too many people for whom Mother’s Day is incredibly painful. Sometimes that is because they had a mother who physically or emotionally abused them, or abandoned them. But, there a host of others for whom Mother’s Day is painful because they wanted to be mothers but experienced issues in pregnancy that resulted in miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, medically necessary abortion because the fetus had died or could not survive outside the womb, stillbirth, or death due to complications after birth. Through no fault of our own we were never able to have children, and never knew the privilege of raising them.

Likewise, the mothers whose children’s lives were cut short for any of a host of reasons including childhood cancers, other medical conditions, or gun and other types of violence.

As a hospital and military chaplain have walked with many such people in the darkest times of their lives. Remembering those mothers, women with unfulfilled dreams of motherhood, and the victims of abusive mothers makes the day difficult. I have far too many memories of being with grieving mothers, and victims of abusive mothers to make the day truly joyful.

Our culture in theory prizes motherhood, but many of our policies make it a difficult endeavor, unless they have significant financial and family resources. Many people call themselves “pro-life,” because they oppose abortion, but support policies that are opposed to life once a fetus has left the womb, from birth to death. Most of these people that claim to be Christians, which is most disconcerting to me as a Christian. I cannot imagine how people so committed to the life of an unborn fetus can be so cruel in promoting social and economic policies and laws that treat with contempt the lives of people that survived being born.

So to all the good mothers, their children, and to those who were not so fortunate I wish you all the best.

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Here is a musical interlude to wish you the best. What a wonderful world it would be if we only gave it a chance.

Until the next time I wish you peace and happiness.